was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
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