You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
