I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
