Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
