why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
