If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
