Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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