she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
