she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize
