the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
