my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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