If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
she pinky promised me she was 18
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
