3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
A bitchslap is in order.
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