My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
