So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Slut skills are useful in every country.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
What a dumb baby whore.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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