I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
