im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
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