I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
