if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I can't turn off my feet"
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
