how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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