it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
