We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
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