i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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