Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Randomize
