is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
