The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
