You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
