If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
