I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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