Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
