Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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