Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I love you. Go after that dick
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
