You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
he just fucked me for my cheese..
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
