my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
