What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Randomize
