yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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