nut hugger
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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