Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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