you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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