I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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