i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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