Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
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