youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
