Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
