just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
