i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
