I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize