if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
