Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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