My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
